🥷 Pocket Picker
Waldemar Anton (Borussia Dortmund) — Collected the ball before the attack could settle in.
Waldemar Anton: 9 Tackles + interceptions; 13 Recoveries; 13 Duels won. Collected the opposition attack before it could settle.
Bundesliga: this week's cards
Every Bundesliga round gets praise and roast cards built from real match numbers: distance run, expected goals, saves, tackles and more. Here are the latest ones; open the app to vote, share and open card packs.
🧱 The Brick Wall
Sebastiaan Bornauw (Hamburger SV) — Granite in defence. Attackers bounced right off him.
Sebastiaan Bornauw: 9 Clearances; 3 Blocks; 6 Aerial duels won. The guard did not change at the edge of the box.
🧤 Safe Hands
Nahuel Noll (SC Paderborn 07) — Locked the gates shut. Made world-class saves look routine.
Nahuel Noll: 9 Saves; 2 Goals conceded; 1.56 Goals prevented (model). The goal was airtight this week.
🧈 Butterfingers
Maarten Vandevoordt (RB Leipzig) — Every shot on target went in. Left his hands in the dressing room.
Maarten Vandevoordt: 6 Goals conceded; 11 Saves; -2.81 Goals prevented (model). Saw a lot of goals this week.
🧺 Spin Cycle Striker
Sheraldo Becker (1. FSV Mainz 05) — The xG piled up; the goals got stuck on spin.
Sheraldo Becker: 1.22 Expected goals (xG); 0 Goals; %0 Shot conversion. Expected goals piled up, goals did not.
🩺 The Box Surgeon
Luis Díaz (FC Bayern München) — Took the expectation chart straight to the goals column.
Luis Díaz: 3 Goals; 0.54 Expected goals (xG); 4/6 On target / attempts. Beat the expectation chart with clinical finishing.
🚀 Launch Pad Intern
Ermedin Demirović (VfB Stuttgart) — Some of those shots filed a flight plan.
Ermedin Demirović: 3 Shots off target; 4 Shots; 0.83 Expected goals (xG). Some of those shots reached orbit.
🧵 Chance Tailor
Michael Olise (FC Bayern München) — Picked the seams of the defence with a pass.
Michael Olise: 5 Chances created; 0.61 Expected assists (xA); 1 Assists. Stitched the passing lane like fine fabric.
📦 Long-Haul Delivery
Joshua Kimmich (FC Bayern München) — Long passes come with a tracking number.
Joshua Kimmich: 11/15 Accurate long balls; 85 Accurate passes; 8.1 Rating. Dropped long balls right at the address.
✂️ Cross Tailor
Bilal El Khannouss (VfB Stuttgart) — Those crosses came off the cutting table.
Bilal El Khannouss: 7/11 Accurate crosses; 5 Chances created; 0 Assists. Cut the crosses like cloth.
📡 Satellite Service
Mats Rots (TSG Hoffenheim) — The cross went to a frequency instead of an address.
Mats Rots: 7 Inaccurate crosses; 7 Cross attempts; 0 Assists. Sent crosses to the wrong frequency.
📞 Wrong Number
Timo Becker (FC Schalke 04) — The misplaced-pass page is getting crowded.
Timo Becker: 16 Inaccurate passes; 38 Pass attempts; %58 Pass accuracy. Sent passes to the wrong address.
🥔 Spud of the Week
Igor Matanović (SC Freiburg) — Playing in wellies. Every touch was an accident waiting to happen.
Igor Matanović: 8 Dispossessed; 10 Inaccurate passes; 6.1 Rating. Plenty of touches, plenty of turnovers.
⛏️ The Butcher
Laurin Curda (SC Paderborn 07) — Went straight for the shins. The referee got arm cramp booking him.
Laurin Curda: 4 Fouls committed; 11 Duels lost; 4 Tackles. Highest foul count of the week.